The Measure: what’s hot and what’s not on planet fashion

Going up

Chanel’s Mademoiselle Privé doormat As seen at Karl’s supermarché spectacular catwalk show. We’re combing Homebase, but no joy so far.

The wide-boy wide collar The early-1980s’ dodgiest jacket collar is 2014’s most brilliantly unlikely comeback. In leopardprint, as at Carven AW14, for extra style points.

Celebratory tattoos Cate Blanchett and Amy Adams went to a tattoo parlour after the Oscars and emerged with suspicious bandages. Rebels.

Photograph: Rex Features

Chrome We have it on good authority that this is the Insta-filter of choice for designer selfies. Free styling trick alert.

Disco sport Summer’s go-to look: something metallic, a hood, great trainers.

Going down

Photograph: Alamy

Chopping veg The busy and virtuous are all using Spiralizers, gizmos that turn courgettes into noodles, aka “zoodles”.

‘Mom jeans’ as an insult Sarah Palin tries to diss Obama as “someone who wears mom jeans“. Honestly. Has she not seen Rag Bone AW14?

Speed-reading apps Designed for reading a novel in 90 minutes. Gave us a migraine after 90 seconds.

Photograph: Planet Photos

Iggy Azalea Now ruining Clueless for us. Cher would not approve.