Fashion Brief
I go out so rarely that just going out is amazing. I’ll listen to music while I get ready. Angry, nihilistic stuff like David Bowie’s Time is good if I’m going somewhere I’m nervous about. I’ve recently liberated myself from wearing body-hugging clothes. I’m trying to buy clothes that feel sensuous rather than styled. I’ve got into silk tunic dresses from All Saints or the White Company. I also love Dawn O’Porter’s Bob dresses. She dressed me in one called the Flack for the British comedy awards.
I would love to be dressed more, because I loathe shopping. I buy loads of clothes from Asos that just sit there until I try them on in a bad temper, right before the returns deadline. I kind of hate clothes; I still wear hipster-style jeans and I’m always showing my arse – totally undignified for a woman of my age.
I’m against lipstick, big time. Dark eyes need nude lips, so I just use a kohl pencil and lots of mascara. What I do is too accidental to be called a smoky eye – it’s more like a smutty eye. My mum taught me how to put on makeup as a teenager, and I’ve been doing it the same way ever since, although I have started doing my eyebrows. I tend to go quite dark, then think, “They don’t look dark enough”, add some black eyeliner, then I look in the mirror and go, “Jesus, I did not know that was happening.” I use a Mac foundation and, sometimes, Sally Hansen tanning spray on my legs.
I don’t take my makeup off before I go to bed. It’s too boring. I feel almost the same about brushing my teeth: ritualistic washroom crap must take about six years off your life.
• Nina Conti is on national tour with her In Your Face live show from 25 September until the end of November; go to ninaconti.net for details.
